Jokes of the Days

WHO YOU BE?

A Nigerian Soldier was re-deployed to Borno from Warri. While the soldier was in Borno, he received a letter from his girlfriend, Rukewe. She explained that while he was away, she had slept with 2 guys and she wanted to break up with him and she wanted her pictures in his possession back. So the soldier did what any Waffi boy would do. He went around and collected unwanted photos of women he could find. He sent them through ABC transport, about 25 pictures of women to Rukewe with the following note: I no remember which one you be, remove your picture and send the rest back….

CHEATING DURING BIOLOGY EXAM

During a Biology exam, the first question was:

“Draw the female reproductive organ.”

As the exam was progressing, Ehis saw Obehi bending down to look between her legs,

so Ehis raised his hands and shouted at the top of his lungs, “Sir, Obehi is copying from the original!”

OSOGONO DON DELETE?……

I called a shildhood friend who lives in Warri to ask after a common friend of ours, Osogono, and asked “if e full ground?”
Shildhood Friend: Shuo! You no aware?
Me: Wetin? Wetin? Osogono don delete?
Shildhood Friend: Abeg clear! Na so person dey quick die? Na fawol?
ME: Oya no vex. Detail me the gist?
Shildhood Friend: Not to hin. No be Sogogbish dey do first-to-die with one kpomushele for Bendel Estate…
ME: I dey hear.
Shildhood Friend: Not to small thing o. No do no do, na so Sogogbish preg the babe.
ME: How that one come be new edition?
Shildhood Friend: I go quench the gist if u shook mouth put again o!
ME: No provoke. Dey relate the gist.
Shildhood Friend: Last month na hin yawa gas o! All this while wey Sogogbish dey comb the babe, our guy no fit decode say she… The babe… Na second verse for one Rear Admiral anthem!
ME: YAWA!
Shildhood Friend: Na so I dey toilet dey kaka for Sogogbish bink I just hear Gboaaa!!! 5 naval guys just matching matching the door. Before I say make I clean kaka… Gbooaaah again!! Them don enter Sogogbish room.
ME: Where Sogogbish come dey?
Shildhood Friend: Aiiiiiiii, if you see the beat them beat me? Me wey I no see the babe kpekus… If u see the kpokporing. I for no kuku clean yansh na… I kaka for body na!
ME: Wia Sogo..?
Shildhood Friend: Sogogbish dislink through ceiling. And I warn am… I warn am say this Admiral babe wey you dey RETWEET anyhow…